That's what I've got here folks. A warrior.
Currently, we have committed to transitioning him to a toddler bed before baby sister comes. He has been in there about a week now. And actually, it's going much better than the last time we tried about a month or two ago. However, last night he got out of bed a couple times (which is no big deal usually because we just put him back in the bed in his half-asleep-dazed state and he goes right back to sleep). This would not have been a problem, but he pulled the "I'm wide awake at 2am" thing (which happened the last time we tried to transition him).
Dan was gracious and got up at least half the time to put him back to bed and apply a gentle reminder to let him know he needed to stay there so I didn't need to hoist my 8-month pregnant self out of bed every time. Good man.
So after being up and down for about an hour, he falls back asleep. Amen!
But alas, he decided wake up after Dan finished his shower this morning at 5:30am. And that was it for the night.
Enter: Mama
There is no way were were going to make it smoothly and cleanly to nap time today with a warrior running full-steam at 5:40am right on through. So it's time to now have him lay in bed with me for at least the next 30-45 minutes. (Caleb too at this point)
Enter: Warrior boy
And so, I set the standard. He needed to lay still, peaceful, and have a happy heart for at least a few minutes with me before I let him go. He understood...he didn't like it.
I held him, and tightly because he is seriously strong, while he wailed and screamed and wriggled. After a while he gets all "I love you mama" and tries to simultaneously get his leg over me to get down. Sorry kiddo, the love appeal getaway move is not working.
Re-enter: tantrum
Fast forward the scene. This ensues for close to two hours.....yes - TWO hours. After a while I wondered if this was ok - but he was clearly having a major tantrum. This was not sad, or hurt or whatever, this was tantrum for not getting his way. So he finally turned in toward me, snuggled up, and rested well for probably five minutes. He was now free to go and none the worse for the battle - he left smiling and happy.
The point is not to give you the play by play of a challenging morning. The point is - when you are raising a warrior, he (or she I suppose) will either fight you (the authority) to the point where you are mastered and no longer the authority .... or you will win.
I chose to win this morning. This is not about winning for the sake of it or parental cruelty or some such nonsense. This was about maintaining the proper order of the home. Parents are the authority over the children and if I let him win through a tantrum or manipulation, he gets the message he won and the next time that ugly monster of the will shows itself, the battle will be bigger, longer, and more tiring.
This morning is that evidence. I have too often not chosen to win and maintain the proper Divine order in my home. Had I chosen to win every time, this battle may not have happened this morning, or it would likely have been much shorter.
Oh the brutal reality of consistency, or rather inconsistency. I am looking to 3, 5, 10, 15 years from now and if I decide that this battle NOW is worth it, I sacrifice fleshly convenience for the sake of having a happy-hearted, inwardly obedient (not just externally), confident, and secure child into the teen years+. I want to win his heart biblically, not in a worldly way or what satisfies my personal comfort zone. I want all my kids' hearts to be won over in love, Biblical love, that they would look unto Jesus and be won over in love for Him.
Welcome to my morning, my challenges, my goals and my delight. They are worth it!
1 comments:
i love you Elisa!
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